One father, his daughter's education is matchless, he has never coached her daughter to do homework know next to nothing ofmething, is back with her daughter talk every day for ten minutes, only four issues talk, to complete his family education. These four questions are:
1, the school has a good thing happen?
2, today you have whichever good performance?
3, today, what good crop?
4, there is nought to his father's help?
backward the seemingly easy question actually contains a crowd of meaning:
first question is in the inquiry of her daughter's values, what about her heart feel good, which is bad;
second question is in fact encouraging her to increase her self-confidence;
third problem is that she confirm what the characteristic learning;
fourth question, there are two meanings, one I care about you, and to learn is your own affair. This is simply four questions, including a lot of care in which love, in fact, also proved very effective.
In educational philosophy, we should educate children, the most fussy is the parent-child relationship properly knob. If the parents in the hearts of children to create an absolute obligation, the children believe their parents unconditional love, I believe that all criticism of parents, starting to recognize their own good, if the child is in the subconscious to fully believe this, then this relationship is healthy , is mutual love, mutual support, mutual understanding and settled relationship. In this case, all the education the children of the most simple things, with the Soviet Union, the great educator Suhomlinski the words However, most real-life parent-child relationship is erratic or misrepresented, the child can not really trust the parents.
love someone's parents are their children, but 98% of Chinese parents the wrong way to love as love. The best example to the children eat, the best clothes to wear, this is just a way of love, not love itself. The parents often love is conditional, such as would occur if the test had the top three, take you where to play and so on.
love is a life like the feelings of another life, a relationship of equivalence, is unconditional, is a general acceptance, is to let the other received, to really is not complicated to do a good parent, to educate the chap must pay attention to the emulating few words:
1, the perfect inhibition of high oppression / hammers a child practice, the establishment of equal narrations.
2, really love their children unconditionally, to give them spiritual sense of love.
3, must respect the child's independent personality.
4, with a positive access to educate their children, often in admission of their encouragement.
5, aline the parent-child relationship, this is the most important point.
6, to pay attention to the spirit of the child's identity.
If you really understand the above 6 words, education is the easy thing boy.
parents should know the laws of psychology
family education is actually a -
Thus, in the process of educating the children, every mother should endeavor to browse some of the The people of the dragon, out of the Phoenix! -
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psychological laws I: Rosenthal Effect -
prominent American psychologist Rosenthal has done such a test: - -
he put a group of mice were randomly divided into two groups: A and B groups, and group A breeder told that this group of mice is very clever; also told the group B of the breeder said he was in this group general intelligence of mice. A few months later, Professor of the two groups of mice through the labyrinth of tests and found that even rats in group A than group B mice really smart, they can be out of the labyrinth and find food. -
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Professor Rosenthal has been so inspired, he wanted this effect can also occur in people who do? He came to a general secondary school, in a class just to take a trip, and then circle the students catalogue a few labels -
words, differentiate their educator that these students' high IQ, very beautiful. After some time, went to this school instructor, a marvel took area, and that he elected several students now really become a class of Jiao-Jiao - who. -
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Why is there such a phenomenon? It is -
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everyone in life will accept this or that psychological implications, which recommend some positive, some negative. Mother is a child favorite, most believed and most dependent people, but also exert psychological implications of people. If -
outcome is negative and long-term disadvantageous psychological implications, and it will affect the child's emotional, serious and even affect their cerebral health. Conversely, if the mother of the children have high hopes,
GHD IV Mini Straighteners, positive affirmation, by looking in the eyes, applause -
Xu smile, encouraging language to nourish a child's center, so that the child more self-esteem, self-love, self-confidence, self-improvement, then, how tall your expectations, the child's future results will be many! -
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psychological laws II: transfinite efficacy -
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famous American author Mark? Twain once pastor in a mosque listening to lectures. Initially, he felt pastor put it very well, people moved, ready to endow. After 10 minutes, the monk has by far achieved, he was a bit impatient and decided to just - to donate some change. After another 10 minutes,
GHD Green Butterfly 2011, the pastor has as yet finished, so he decided not to donate a penny. Wait until the pastor finally finished a lengthy lecture at the beginning fund-raising, Mark? Twain as angry, not only did not donate money, but also from the - plate stole 2 dollars. -
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that too much provocation, too lusty and too long to cause the role of psychological resistance very impatient or psychological phenomenon called -
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flood effects often occur in family education. For example, when children make mistakes, parents will be once, twice, three, even quadruple, five times repetition of the same thing as criticism, so that children from the anxiety of crime aversion to impatience and even dislike. Was -
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seen, critique of the child's mother can not surpass the restrict, should the child If I must once again reproved, it should not simply repeat, to another point, in other words. In this way, the child will not feel the same blunders being -
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psychological laws III: Desiree effect
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Desi
psychologist who tells a fable: - -
a group of children frolic in front of an old, sounds and moaning. Over the past few days, the elderly unbearable. So he came out to 10 pence for each child, said to them: , and continue to frolic. Old people all over to 5 cents for each child. It also can be 5 cents, children are still happily - to go. On the third day, the old man gave only 2 cents per child, children with exasperation,
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In this fable, the age man is simple, he will be the children's internal motivation ingredients, so it manipulated the children's behavior. -
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Desi effect when seen in life. For example, a child's parents often said: Parents may not have thought, is this the wrong provocations, the child's interest in learning a little bit to decrease the. -
in knowledge, parents should lead their children and foster lofty ideals, to promote children's emotional and interest in learning, increase the child's own motivation for learning, help children gain the joy of learning. Parents reward can be advantageous in learning some asset, such as books, learning equipment, and some unrelated to reward and learning, it is best not to. -
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psychological laws IV: southerly effect
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south wind
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northerly and southerly than the power to see who can take off their coats pedestrians. First, to a cold cold north air, biting cold, the results pedestrians to resist the aggression of the north wind,
GHD Red Straighteners, he gave the overcoat coated tightly. Southerly then slowly blow, suddenly sunny, pedestrian feel the appearance of spring itself, the beginning of the unlock button, and then took off his coat, southerly conquered. -
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southerly anecdote has been able to effect their goals, because it conforms to the inner needs. This inspiring self-reflection due to meet the needs of the psychological self-reaction is the -
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this we can know, family education, the use of Implementation of tenderness education, more -
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psychological laws V: bucket effect
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wood. -
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a child to learn the disciplinary performance is like a big tub, every penalty scores are up this huge pail of indispensable chip of lumber. Good academic performance the child can not rely on the permanence of the formation of certain subjects results - emphatic, but it should rely on the overall position, especially on some of its disabilities. So when the children base deficient in certain subjects, it should be a timely reminder of the child, giving him the discipline to spend some more time on - between, so that 'each other. -
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psychological laws Six: Hawthorne effect
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Hawthorne vegetation outdoor Chicago, is a telephone alternate fabrication factory, have better recreational facilities, health concern system and stipend system, etc., but the laborers are still furious, product conditions far from ideal. Later, the heart - specifically its science experts carried out a test, that is two years' time, talk to experts to find workers, 2 million individual passengers, provisions in the conversation, patiently listening to workmen on the plant to the various outlooks and dissatisfaction. The talk test - received an abrupt result: Hawthorne factory's output value increased significantly. -
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children in learning and growth process will inevitably be muddled or dissatisfied, but can not be entirely expressed. As a mother, to try to find time to talk with their children, and talk about the process, to patiently guide the children enjoy that, his own life, learn in confusion, his own parents, schools, teachers, students, etc. dissatisfaction. -
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children, So, they will be more exertions in learning, life will be more confident! -
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psychological laws VII: changes in effect
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interpersonal relationships in the For example, many salespeople is to seize the people of this intellect, when the said goods to the customer is always first grasp a small stack in the pan in a little bit and then inserted, and not a lot on that first grab panel then a little bit to come up with. -
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we evaluate the child when the inevitable will he must tell some pros and cons, and often a In fact, this is a very good evaluation. In the evaluation of the child, we may wish to use
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psychological laws VIII: The Butterfly Effect
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According to the research, the southern hemisphere a butterfly oscillating its wings sometimes brought up the feeble flow, the blending due to other factors, a few weeks, would be swept into Texas, a tornado! Scientists call this disarray is now - as known as the . -
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Sentence expression, one thing's manipulation, right and proper, may affect a child's life; wrong and dictatorial, may be adversely affected by the child's life. -
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psychological laws Nine: labeling effect
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during World War II, the United States as shortage of crews, but they really need a team of soldiers of war. Thus, the U.S. administration resolved to organize the inmates in prison on the front line fighting. To this end, the U.S. administration experts on mission for several prisoners psychology education and mobilization before the warfare, and with them went to fight in the war. -
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training phase they are not psychological specialists to lecture also many, but with special accent ashore the prisoners each week to the closest person to jot their own letter. Contents of the letter from the psychologist unified formulation, is depicted in the rendition of inmates in prison is - how agreeable, how to rehabilitate and so ashore. Experts shrieked because the prisoners sent after cautiously copying their darling folk. Three months afterward, made it to the front, the specialists must inmates write letters to adored ones how to abide his directive, how to heroic and so above. Result, these prisoners on the battlefield to the performance of no fewer than the regular army, they fight as they said in the letter for to comply the bid, as brave and hard work. Later, psychologists put - a phenomenon understood as the -
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the psychological laws in family schooling has one exceedingly momentous character. For sample, if we are always facing the children shouted what we call -
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Therefore, moms have to get rid of laugh disgrace, reproach the grumbles of intimidation and additional languages, the use of motivational language, spliced to the child more positive tag. -
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psychological laws ten: board threshold effects
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often in everyday life such a phenomenon: when you apply help from others, if the begin make higher claims, it is easy to be rejected; and if you first make a smaller request, and then increase others to engage to demands heaviness, easier to achieve the target, a phenomenon psychologists call -
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in family education, we can likewise use For example, the first made for children with lower requirements, as required until they do, be sure to acknowledge and even reward, then gradually boost the requirements, so that the children happy ending to actively make progress. -
parents of ten children bad habits will ruin family education
Why do parents pay
griefs can not be a good return, our children really are the supercilious look wolf? If you are a parent full of chaos, or you are a do not want to meet this confusion the parents of the future, amuse and connect us, uncover the mist of confusion this group to see the fact invisible behind the mist - Gestalt China coach Chen Pengyu parent-child education in the famous teacher, through the accumulation of a great number of cases, to explore how self-righteous parents out of love destroyed the elemental confident happy child of ten mutual problems, you may hope to control a look.
1. placed the child high expectations and the pursuance of the faultless
often said that the higher the expectations the greater the displeasure, in array not to make their own displeasure, only to proceed to put pressure on the child. In this case, the child will meet the parents, meet the teachers and even meet the social assessment as a
such a high amount to get the children, 23% of navel and high school is recognized as
2. When children do not disparage his own satisfaction, discipline he
fact, children can not be satisfied while the parents have been quite criminal, this period from the parents maximum in need of love, companionship, assist and support. Parents bypass children's emotions of being dominated at their emotions, equitable want: you are my child, you give me demanding credit, you want me to have face, you can not lose my face! Then use your own weird digit of rules and structure to jump kid. But kid are often more tied more rebellious, more you control, the more he ambition not listen!
Pengyu teacher's house to have a infant daughter at the beginning of vacatiin time every day playing the game, kick 12 o'clock at night before bed. Home mother, aunt and grandmother are sprinting out of patience: it every day, playing on the computer, do not write how to do the job! Blame the child, the child nostril overturned Pengyu teacher that I'm back, is worried to catch up with his wife,
GHD Diamond Flag 2011, for that material. He entered his daughter's room: her daughter back called out He said: playing computer it, all right, you play! And then hand on her daughter's pate, half-jokingly said: father sends you some of the energy of love, do not detain you play, you continue to play with. Ten minutes later, he let go, said: Well, do not want to play on the mattress earlier ah, do not tired!
night, his daughter half quondam ten he fell comatose.
give them some space, let the children remain in a state of guilt can be loved,
GHD IV Straighteners, the children will must obey as well as the feasibility of self-responsibility. The child did not so satisfied that you are well aware of his own things, to attach silent, simply give them love, support even more important!
3. to take their children compared with others
This is a common problem for all parents. Pengyu teacher said: When you put
4. conditionally encounter children's needs
you purchase shoes on the 1st test! you into the top five we have the whole family to voyage! numerous parents regarded this as a reasonable liberal award for the child shakes! everyone knows, this brought the unconscious child information is: meet the parents of the criterion, is loved. Then the children will love to get their parents to disburse the cost of losing their own!
Pengyu teacher asked her daughter to learn from nothing, even jokingly said: happy. Her father said: Dad, today invited me to eat KFC now! The father said: Well! But my father was not because you have to query you the third test. Daddy loves you, even now you final the first test final third, eat KFC, and my father would inquire you!
children impatiently said: Well, well, know. How you her heart, goes without mentioning it, happy go another!
5. reprove the child is not
parents are most compliant to reprove the child, to teach children! teachings are particularly keen to each parent 1 thing, some people feel from the teachings in their reputation, it was from experience the thrill of conquest.
entire regardless of the child is convinced in the mouth, or heart convinced! However, the best educating is Reprove the child is not, not let the children lose self-confidence is to let the children lose self-esteem.
6. prophesied that children unpromising
predict the consequences of the child, there are two good for nothing, one more you say he good for nothing, the more he good for nothing, complete loss of morale and ability to learn, and afterward your prophecies! another child, the more you say that he did not Offer, measure to anything more he should prove himself, but a lifetime alive in the
grew up in a rural girl, she had a brother on. Parents favor youth sibling, identified likely than her brother. She was very frustrated, very convinced. So self-tempering, must Zheng Kouqi parents look to discern if her brother can not lose out. Later, she turned Bi Gege better results, work to campus, have a good job, marital. But because a lot of time and vigor to prove to her parents to see, over time that her husband intolerable to her divorce ... ...
7. instead of the child to prefer
child's psychological independence period has three stages, namely 3 years, 9 and 12 years old. Small, when the children eat their own, parents should be caring and non-interference, not to say the dress you must eat, and I feed it! Or children and then you must think what to wear on behalf of alternative! There voicelessly for the children reported that the piano classes, are unwise.
parents forever use Deprived of decisive aspects of your child's growth, the loss of a child's competence.
8. Limit your children do what he wanted to do
parents favor to say: Do this, do not favor!
child's ecology, although, is namely the extra you do me the more I ambition apt how apt!
9. always worried about their children
do not consider children have control, do not believe that a child could have! So - you do not want to get the results the best way is to fret about! you are worried about their children puppy love, puppy love child one exact; you are worried about a child web addiction, the child must addiction!
children also have a mother in the first grade when, on the Internet after a advising when a child: not seen, this is Internet, many children go in on the bad, and you can not go in! day to day , children do not understand the beginning, but extremely quaint mind, and finally one day the children could not help but to look forto this Internet cafe.
addiction of children and then later! child self-confidence, depending on their parents treat them.
10. do not trust that children
do not believe the child is the basis reason parents do not believe in themselves. When the child said to his mother: nothing, I am a person at home doing their homework, you get busy now! Mothers wanted to shut the door, the child must play on the calculator at home, too! This feedback makes the children feel their parents do not trust me, do not like me, does not adore me! do not believe the child is to demolish the child's self-esteem. Parents always attempt to put their children in the way toward the success of training, is committed to amplifying the child as As well as a variety of problems pile up children.
Pengyu teacher said: parents educate their children in the process, is to adapt their status to the process of truce and joy, the state of calm and joy is love! child's education process, but also the idea, to broaden the process! to alteration the child is cozy, when you
parents small change, the children significantly different.
he will learn from their parents a little bit
parents should believe their child is good! Every child has a chapter belonging to his large place! Do not compare children's self-esteem havoc.