55 of the {livestock} joke , {also} {comic} , you

1, the day in a friend's house, the phone did not know where did not find it,Nike Shox Butikk, to lend a friend's phone call about his girlfriend and listen to where it is. I enter my digit, 1 press turntable clasp, the screen shows that she saved my name: SB3 (then amused, but fortunately a third ...)
2, when I dig pocket, a key out, was not found, then go back and look!
a pair of young lovers in the street where the man suddenly said excitedly: Who? In the end is this?
I thought is the key to quickly say: My, my! My
later learned, had that woman productive. . . . Poor my face ah. . . Pain for a few days
3, opened today in the school group conferences, sudden unexpected sneezed, looked up, it was found in front of the girls nostril Biao to the back of the female and not aware of, so secretly want to help her expunge, just his hand up, next to the girl discovered, shouting a glass of dry for a tolerate have reacted. . .
rushed to the toilet, not stand on spewing out of the full one place ah. . . . Rustled the mouth back to sit down, nothing like people. After a while, a friend got up and said to the toilet, I genial advice: money chasm in the
7, navel school, a job done well, work on the teacher gave me this batch of two words, redo,
2 morn I went to Mai Zaodian, and then the operation of this to help me disburse him the same table,
the most classic places, and he wrote back in the redo old one, do not do. paid,
Next, on a tragedy,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, more tragic is the graduate soon, he told me ,,,,,,
8, in the thronged streets back to go short-handed signal broke the sound, not respond, a Buick mercantile traffic to hit my shoulders; I did not obtain angry,Nike Shox R2, just gently took out the opener, in the course of its progress consist in ... The blueprint of the Road graceful arc
9, in a stall to buy socks, a pair of cheap, had to buy thirty pairs, the results of only dark models of the same, selling socks Huyou I said, a color is good, lost a top who can take the other can not see ... I thought also, so bought a thirty pairs ....
So two days a change of ...
Results After approximately two months, I really could not stand the same table, and said: slothful you a lot, how two months you do not even say for a pair of socks
I :....
10 recent cooling of the highway to see a muscular man, open cars roadster, wearing a motorcycle helmet.
11, aboard a whim, to take their own photos for desktop ... and then my microprocessor on poisoned ...
12, high school with methodology nonsense
Petrochemical ... ...
after a while I
do it online to find a wife the day before yesterday
financial software, I'll give her computer, I sit and watch, wife of versed open www.google.com, type in the search bar Open Baidu, something she continues to find - - +
now, I'm looking fjust aboutmething that will be with his wife, to google Baidu, ... ...
14, say the students parents.
the beginning of love his parents. One daytime to go shopping, his mother took a idea to a jacket, merely a look at the price to pull his father away.
his dad said: we can not afford can not attempt? His father on his mother and forcibly into the locker chamber.
alteration out of his mother, his father a look at the East West Chou Chou, took his mother ran, said: Run! While the seller is not!
his mother wearing the jacket,Nike Shox Torch, label drifting out, dragged out by his father flew, just passing through a pillar, his mother holding a crying post. His father back serious, said: Run! You are not waiting to be caught ah?
his mommy cried even more fiercely. Then his dad laughed: ha ha ha ha ... ... raiment when you go in the money I paid ahead.
15, batch jobs, see the students do not paint geometric problems, readily Comments: No map no truth ~



16, his girlfriend would like to retard the bill, send text messages to 10086: I The bill left the number of
17, students A car accident, leg rupture, hospitalization
few of us went to see him play good students entered the inpatient
met him on my parents
rapidly went to ask A's condition on the results of an open
becomes
.
18, in lofty school, the maximum funny thing that would
money, we constantly chip in apt purchase smokes, I was 2 and my buddy fair bought a Heyan
ready to go to the lavatory pumping the results to class, the class teacher's class, forget it
premier class while the class to see the lad prowling wrote a memorandum, then rub a great team, I was darted over
see the class teacher, class teacher directly down and taken away, standing on the podium began to read
sweat ing, whether I kas long asis written is legal, I would prefer not swallow her
teacher and a mouth: (my byname, if there are mortifying one hundred students to acknowledge me, I) br> grief ... ...
classic appeared

19, my roommates make fun of me, my wallet secluded in a little box, MD The problem is that little box that I sent to Guangzhou to Nvwang a gift sent to me too many bad two days after the breakthrough his wallet was gone. I am in Wuhan, my personality card, bank card, his girlfriend of photographs in Guangzhou Nvwang hands.
20, Yesterday at Wal-Mart, suddenly ache my stomach, quelling explosion into the bathroom, just an earth-shattering outbreaks began to squat, the results of the children next door and rupture into tears, her mother asked her how, she said, smelly ~ ~
21, arrived in the coastal, discharging is completed. The appendix of an exercise mission is to behave anti-landing exercise fort division, and everybody flew the vehicle to arrange. I was weight-bearing wheels with grease pistol to grease, portly department political commissar standing behind me a moment and said with concern: small comrades hard it! I did not expect tanks to boost the spirit of 12 wheels, tanks, infantry not cozy ah! I was moved about to tears
.
22, high school class when we get together is all smoking
day I happen to have a more proud of things to acquaint you the results I smoked slow
additional human clouded, and I left half-root, see fast to class, huge jaws suck two
teacher suddenly came in, I asked myself a thrown on the ground, their feet, but just a tread
cigarette smoke into the two had to hold your breath
have seen the class teacher, came over and asked me, you is not smoking it
I shook my head
teacher: teacher speak
continued shaking his head
anger: you gave me to speak
me: ... pumping ... I do not smoke ... ... (forward with the smoke from the nose and mouth often spouting)
teacher did not choked smile ... ...
23, today, go colleagues and I went out to dinner, we were a point dish chili scrambled eggs, and found cilia and colleagues use chopsticks hair, hurrahing, you see the boss ~ ~ What namely this? Boss a look, oh call ~ phoned, to, come here! To the madam because a couple of chopsticks
24, spent 50 dollars on the Internet to buy a chip of hand-made face soap, with a day or two at night cerebral about the time that has been slender with half of the above also have a soap bubble, angry I am spewing blood.
my dad said you this good to use soap, bath covered with slippery.
25, the first Italian to dine pizza, do not know dine anything,Nike Shox R5, on the point were 38 yuan plus 8 yuan to send a cheese package.
complete meal and found something was lacking, I thought, had far less cheese,
then cried: waiter, my share of cheese not on how ah? I have finished, and also allows people to eat?
Waiter: Sir, you that have been poured in your cheese pizza a ...
me: all right, you go to a engaged bar ...
26,Nike Shox OZ, at noon back to the hotel, I saw a cup Coke, direct a full nectar. Drinking my face was green. Quarters that the man had bought a bag of vinegar dumplings, no place to fall, with my cup installed. . .
27, topics like the teacher to join them, one day the teacher Topic: my people more forgetful, and last night bath and forgot to turn off the gas ...
then my mom helped me wash up the shambles on the side of the side said: So you definitely can not sin, because it naturally will leave testify of a offense .. .
29, to complete a physical day, not hungry, went to the restaurant, numerous people, too crowded, and confusion, I call on the Dafan Aunt: , ladies who cook on the inside shouted: stream sounded, I do not know which day to slay the person in a blue ballpoint pen and drew a surround, write, this is the killer ... ...



31, I live favor a sophomore afterward door true article ..
person A teacher at the school was found sleeping ... well done ..
he called a solution to the blackboard in front of the subject .....
not ready to write the words of public humiliation A
truth a blackboard the teacher did not come to him began to sour grades are so bad ..
dare to sleep really shameless
school head is not at home ... only to sleep all day .. .
did not think he would actually write ... .. the solution is also very smart ...
teacher a morsel ungainly position ... had to let him back seat do not control him well ....
He actually did not think the teacher was kind enough to choke one ....
I sleep for about
you ambition still not be the query me
32, my sibling went to a school playing basketball, listening to a low-grade girls to a low-grade boy asked: you say I love your ..
33, mentioning that my girlfriend hit a summer job in a mobile phone sell call
Square One day at noon, luncheon period, almost no stores, my girlfriend next to the counter to the an uncle-class people will look at cell phone, just that partition of the counter not to eat the MM, weakly, looking like uncle also buy a mobile phone Zhu Er, no arm on the counter together with the branch heads, because MM Chest (crab) of relatively large, the uncle suddenly found seeing it to see MM's milk (crab) ditch, all eyes look straight, my wife found out, would like to remind that MM, MM no results repercussion, after a few minutes, MM openings: Big Brother, watching enough? seen enough to buy a cell phone it ... ...
outcome uncle said nobody, bought a compartment phone running for the door and fled on a ... ...
34, My friend said, a colleague of his relatives to Xiamen, Xiamen, e relatives gave a cartoon, on the bus, the driver who looked at this e anime, wanted to detect the location, the driver stopped him and said: full read: the door to preserve a poise, then they feel a shit to all over, so he began to coerce, the force also secondhand unknowingly hand, the results of... I X, broken locks, I roll out.
you want your students at the students outside to see the scene?! a light (crab) Ding students suddenly rolled out from the toilet, going to the toilet is also accompanied by a PP in the spurt out from his , indeed frightful!!! and a ground we basically knew, I X!! this life in front of their classmates gang suppressed the ...
36, the morning her husband took me to the unit left and then I suddenly received his text message: Bus windows were shut, the motorcar smells bad some people are surely frown. But that climate of MM is very normal to her from his pocket and saw a straw on the side of the mouth and open the skylight a gap, ravenous sucking the outside air 。。。。。 would an average human ah =. =
38, our math teacher likes simulating to be witty to say a joke that no one laughed
our class consult a spoof on him, so the first thing he said when the school, we all laughed in unison
day he came in, was silent for a moment that his father died
I immediately break out laughing, others muffle.
39, water and taint it
look a cashier in a quite serious cluster of coins
a few kids ran, ran to sing: in front of the downstream bridge over a group of ducks, Come Come and count, twenty-four thousand six hundred seventy-eight 。。。。
and then the cashier is reduced at half the number of coins to go back and re-number ....
40, high school boarding school, some students go home to let him take along something to help me, they mail txt messages: I boil clothes and money.
41, and girlfriend, dating, see the front and my girlfriend like there's a, it took up below her ass.
she turned around and gave me a slap.
when someone pat my shoulder I turned around ...
girlfriend gave me a slap.
42, the day suddenly take a phone call: Oh, surmise there is a gift! Not that I hang up! call to my office, said: posted to our Xinghua this undertaking.
this newspaper really is too sudden, when the two of us in the army then do not say, sensibility particularly good few years antecedent lost contact, imagine that he suddenly came to our Xinghua I told him on the phone, I immediately went to elect him up their cooperative unit, get together at midday.
I went to their cooperative element, lad!'s truly impressive, all diplomatic treatment mode, added the enterprise the door on cross-examination the barricade together, enroll, sign particularly rigid approximately my comrades who are stationed in units of people, I added the corporation had agreed to guard.
I went to the old fellow said workshop, to see old comrades I nodded at me, and made a face. I mean I do know, not to rush, do not allow parlor, let me in the side after on.
I am bored foolish, in the workshop in turn for a meantime, from the bag and took out a news point of view up in the mart door and suddenly there is a boss who went to look behind me, stood beside a security, he looked at me, patted my shoulder and said: That is the boss, you do not even know he was still here what merge mix. point of others, got off the phone to send the patient to go to the spoken medication, I gently into the room, gently blow {awake|awake} patient, and said softly: Grandpa, up to embezzle food right!
45, final night boiled crab, open water, I threw one crab boiler. crab is very fresh in the kettle tamper.
agreeable wife to melodrama cautiously, you tin not see this, then over his eyes can not hide behind me look.
I relieved said: Allison, we are not also marble?
wife: ah ... ... ... ... salt already?



46, sitting today bus, there is a one-stop driver asked: Do not setup the
48, Dragon Boat Festival to go to the unit sent a carton of milk and a sack of Thai rice Shanghao unit a female colleague behind work to aid me aid him migrate back family, downstairs, the colleagues I said: My husband was not home, hurry up! take more than,Nike Shox R6, NND, that district where there are a lot of people know me. he wanted to prompt her not to shout: . My husband was not home, hurry up, so perturbed immediately! : Students, today, not class, school
50, one day more than four in one night a friend called to say the sentence: Q Do you have what material. curse words on periodical, it says tomorrow, if you do not copy the contents of this periodical 50 times, then sent to other people, will die is tough to see, and so on and so on. I was scared of the students go home on the night quickly copied 50 The next day sent to others, sent out a few begin, but then we know what it is, do not say that he fed to the paper, so the morning passed, and his hands also the collection of several dozen .
afternoon, the first music class, the teacher points to his label occurred to him sing, I saw the crying little boy stood up and said sadly: ah ....understand, but a strong patriotism told he could not lose face in front of the Japanese, so he laughed and nodded blindly: 53, my wife and I play to the Reclining Buddha, his wife wade the road, so I carry her.
saw an old woman, serious, said: peruse the paperback to see who you are. his wife is sick alternatively go to the hospital early, Buddha is useless
54, the students travel, approached the top, a special excitement hilltop girls shouted: motherland, ah, my mother! then a crush on this inciting special woman shouting boys: the motherland ah, my wife's mother!
55, my house has been rented to a Japanese guests, day visitors hit me that a phone with a not very eloquent in Chinese, said: running out, could you help me join it!