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Old 08-03-2011, 10:47 AM   #1
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Thumbs up Hermes Ostrich Grain Leather Birkin 40cm Togo Bag: Special ...

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Old 08-03-2011, 11:41 AM   #2
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2172792 2009年11月07日 00:21 阅读(loading...) 评论(0) 分类:休闲搞笑

今天我从我15岁的女儿电脑上搜出来一部A片,藏在“未来的职业”文件夹里,未来的职业!Wh at a ########ing day!
  
  
  晚上我女朋友说我太娘了,我很火大,就跟她吵起来了,本来是想显得男人一点,结果最后控制不住哭起来了 。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  昨天晚上我裸着就穿一内裤躺床上,边喝酸奶边上网,不小心酸奶滴到身上了,我正在擦,nike air force,我爸突然进来了,居然以为我在SY什么话也没说扭头又关门出去了。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  今天对着镜子端详了一会儿,突然发觉自己长得有点像李宇春!What a ########ing day!
  
  
  周五喝多了带一女的回家,没有套,我有点担心搞出事,那女的说没事,及时出来就行了。结果等到高潮我控 制不住了正要拔出来的时候,那女的突然两腿一盘裹住我的腰,死命夹着我大叫:“当我孩子的爹吧 !!!” 我当场就在里面完事了。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  新买了件情趣内衣,昨天晚上吃完饭了悄悄换上,爬到饭桌上挑逗老公。。。。。。。。。。。。。桌子塌了 ,负伤,内衣撕破。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  今天和我小外甥坐沙发上一边吃薯片一边看电视,吃着吃着感觉薯片都湿乎乎的,扭头一看,他把每个薯片都 整个舔一圈然后又放回袋子里了,nike air force ones。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  
  
  在教学楼上大号,站起来的时候手机咕噜掉下去了,我忙低头看:还好,卡在下水洞口了。我俯身正要拾起来 ,突然来了一条短信,嗡嗡……手机一顿震动,留下了下水口浮上的一串气泡,nike air force one。我不要手机,我只想知道哪位大哥发的那条短信。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  
  今天才发现和我合租的鸟人一直在用我的丝瓜刷马桶!!!!我一直用它洗澡的!!!!wha t a ########ing day!
  
  
  
  今天我在msn上跟我女朋友说话,然后收到信息说:“**不在,我是她室友,她在她男朋友那儿。”我愣 了3秒钟,回头看看我屋子,好像没发现她。what a ########ing day!
  
  
  昨天在沃尔玛,突然闹肚子,强忍着冲进卫生间,刚一蹲下就开始惊
  
  天动地的喷发,结果隔壁的小孩大哭起来,她妈问她怎么了,她说,
  
  臭~~ What a ########ing day
  
  
  昨天在我男朋友电脑上翻出来几张半裸的女人照片,而且穿着我的裙子!没有拍头,但不可能是我。我简直崩 溃了,正强压着怒火准备去质问他的时候,突然反应过来,那不是其他女人,那是他!What a ########ing day!
  
  昨天晚上在酒吧一个很漂亮的mm过来直接问我要号码,我受宠若惊,立刻给了她,然后就看她回到她朋友那 儿,把我电话号码给了她一个男性朋友,那哥们还朝我挥手。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  
  昨天做爱爱想玩点小情调,点了两个小蜡烛,LG很兴奋,说去放音乐,过了会儿外屋响起国际歌的声音。。 。他说放这个很来劲。。。What a ########ing day!
  
  大早上的上课犯困,玩着手机就睡着了。 有人拿东西捅我,说老师叫你。我立刻站起来,结果有够�。老师说,我叫女生,你站起来干嘛。好吧,那你就回 答问题吧。 What a ########ing day!
  
  
  ……今天有个日本考察团到我们学校,这是我第一次看到穿着衣服的日本人……What a ########ing day!
  
  
  有位帅哥要搭我的顺风车,狂开心。上车后,我开车很快。帅哥说,你开车的姿势真酷啊。我一听,更加来劲 了,一边用左手打方向盘,一边用右手戴上我的太阳眼镜,谁知左手一打滑,赶紧猛的一刹车,右手的眼镜没有带 上去,一只眼镜腿直勾勾地插到我的鼻孔里去了,拿出来还带出一坨鼻屎! what a ########ing day,air force one shoes!
  
  
  自己生活无落,听到父亲病危,请假一月从南方回到北方。病床24小时陪护四十天,自己体力、经济条件已 到极限,狠心离开。。。。。十天后,父亲病故,light up air force one。真的不给我机会啊,老头你对我有意见啊。“What a ########ing day!”
  
  
  刚上大学,新生交流会,轮到我上台介绍自己,到了台上超级紧张,结结巴巴的说不出话。班长台下安慰说, 你就随便说点什么吧。然后一咬牙,本来想说:“同学们不好意思,我比较害羞,第一次见面,实在说不出来。” 结果到最后一句时,舌头一打结,说成了:第一次见面,实在射不出来。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  今天一大家子人聚会,中午他们打麻将,我困了就去睡觉,我表弟躺我旁边,醒来的时候发现自己的手插在表 弟裤子里。。。。可能睡梦中当成我女朋友了。。。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  在我爸办公室上网,远远听见我爸上楼声音,连忙想把弹在桌上的烟灰吹开,结果用力过猛吹到了烟灰缸,一 桌一脸全是烟灰。。。。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  班上有个女孩个高,条顺,暗自叹息人家条件太好了不是咱的菜,后来一哥们问她的电话,有些不情愿,但还 是告诉他了,我以为他不行的-太丑了,后来,哥们拿下了她,在学校传为佳话。再后来返校同学聚会,全部大醉,她执意要我送她回家,路上她 抱着我狂亲流泪说,我是他第一眼就喜欢男孩 What a ########ing day!
  
  
  昨天和BF、他朋友在屋子里,我想悄悄放个屁陷害他朋友,不料坐姿没调整好,发出声来了。 What a ########ing day!
  
  
  刚开始和女朋友偷食禁果,有一次家人不在,把她带到家里住了两天,晚上在父母卧室ml,正在努力的时候 ,不经意的一抬头看到父母挂在墙上的画像,当场不行了……What a ########ing day!
  
  
  昨天BF跟我说,这次ML要创新!!!@-@!!然后就把我的眼睛用黑布蒙上了。一番XXOO极爽之后,我满意的解开黑布,结果发现BF穿着我的护士 服带着我的护士帽坐在我身上。。。。。。OMG。。。要不要提醒他忘拿针筒了。。。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  今天和追我的一男的出去逛街,特地穿了露肩的衣服,特地把内衣的带子给下了。然后在街上不知中了什么邪 两手同手往背后一甩....然后...内衣扣开了。。。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  交了个有钱男朋友。怕人说我傍大款,所以从来不跟他提钱的事,想在财务上干干净净。结果昨天正亲热呢, 他说,“放假去香港吧。买衣服。”我本想说,light up shoes for men,“给你买啊?”结果说出来是“你买啊?” 他说,“对,给你买”……这下完全说不清了 What a ########ing day!
  某日我在宿舍厕所大便 不料阿姨打扫卫生 拖把从隔壁拖得水直接溅到屁屁上。。。还不能叫。。。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  好不容易请到领导吃饭,点完菜发现没带现金,怯怯地问是否可以刷卡被回绝,借口下楼周围ATM取款,未 果,返回酒楼只好和领导说没带够钱,领导那表情,让我一辈子忘不了。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  某日女上位 正和男友ML,我在上面卖力舞动~他突然睁眼对我说:“老婆,我岔气了~”。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  使用哇嘎下载毛片,输入了一个关键字KAO,然后就挑了一个下载,打开一看,傻了, 考拉吃树叶子。。What a ########ing day!
  
  
  晚上敷着面膜熬夜,时间差不多了去厕所洗掉,厕所灯开着,我以为是自己刚刚没有关掉,结果推开门看到继 父在里面背对着门口SY。。还低吟。。我默默地合上门,回到自己的房间。三分钟之后继父看到门缝里的灯光过 来敲敲我的门让我早点睡觉……What a ########ing day!!
  穿夹克骑500cc雅马哈出门,被人夸车好看,想都不想就回了句:那是,因为骑在我身上。 。我是女的 what a ########ing day!
  
  
  我不知道肛交有时候会导致屎喷出来……what a ########ing day!
  上完课刚好下着雨,出门推车的时候旁边一MM说:啊~还骑车啊,会湿的拉。结果她男朋友想也没想回了句 :又不是骑你,湿什么湿。当时我和朋友忍不住爆笑,MM红着脸快速跑掉了.What a ########ing day!
  
  
  那天和lp做爱,刚到高潮,已经忍不住了,我爸突然开门回来,屋里的我们赶紧从床上爬起来换衣服,因为 时间紧我没穿内裤,直接套了条睡裤出去,一边射在睡裤上,一边装作镇定的和我爸说话。。。。W hat a ########ing day!
  
  
  早上在跟女上司聊天,本想说:老大,你动动脑(nao)子好好想想。 谁知道不小心把o打成了i,变成了:老大,你动动奶子好好想想。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。 What a ########ing day!
  
  中午开车送老婆到购物中心后,找了个最偏僻角落停车,把靠背放下休息等她回来。后来来了一个花枝招展的 妹妹可能以为车里没人(我的车贴了深色的膜,反射效果很好)又是补妆又是整理内务,我一动也不敢动,可是老 婆回来了...What a ########ing day!
  
  
  来例假了BF就想让我给他KJ,我希望我的嘴也有例假。What a ########ing day! 看完这个筒子这段话。。我贴给我老公看。。 嗯。。然后我就希望我的屁眼也有例假 What a ########ing day!
  
  
  逃课和女友在她们宿舍,做完了就躺床上聊天。突然她舍友回来了,推门进来看到我的屁股,很尴尬就退出去 了。我安慰女友说别介意,大家都熟,她出去转转就好了。然后继续第二轮,结果,五分钟后,那舍友以为我们穿 好衣服了,推门又进来。。。What a ########ing day!

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