Helpless laughing raucously brilliant summary of l

1. Chinese characteristics, earthquake escape guide: what to say earthquake escape methods are white blind, listen to me: the earthquake, the building to the national emblem hanging in the run, make sure you die 2. Meet professors, talk about four cardinal vices; case to the wealthy, about humane care; face backward to talk about net worth status, met the older generation, about kidney function; face ugly, talking about past rivers and lakes; meet beautiful women, talk about sad love; met a monk, about frolicking in the bedroom ; met otaku, talk forums; met wolf se, about compassion quiet; met Barack Obama, talking about respect for sovereignty; met Kim Jong Il, On adhere revolution; encounter the living, talking about stability and unity; meet the dead to talk about harmony and stability 3. We do not feel happy, because we do not pursue \4. Woman tears in bed, more than in any one place. Said a man lying in bed, but also more than in any one place. (Zhang Xiaoxian) 5. There are three things people can not hide: coughing, poverty and love, you want to hide, but trying to hide something. There are three things people should not be squandered: the body, money and love, you want to splurge, but worth the candle. There are three things people can not stay: the life, time and love,herve leger bandage dress, you want to retain, but lopsided. There are three things you should remember: the disaster, death and love,juicy couture pas cher, you want to remember, but miserable. 6. You and it is about law, it and your politics; you and its politics, public opinion about it and you; you and it say public opinion, it is bullying you; you and it is bullying, it and tell you the law. 7. Real pain, no one can share with you ------ you can only put it from one shoulder, switch to your other shoulder. 8.Don 't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to. Do not worry, the best things to waste their time at the most. 9. Forum rules: 1, Mo talk about affairs of state, because talk is useless and may even have lost even the position; 2, Mo of people wrong, because people will only discredit his character down to even lower than the other; 3,juicy couture velour, Mo talks themselves, I do not want to talk about the lack of information has become the talk of the capital; 4, MO selling, this position is off the network fine and generous people poor, mean the former, the latter had no money; 5, Mo bubble beauty, is mainly a lot of looks like the beauty of the people are men. 10. Human unhappiness is the only reason he did not know how to stay in the room quietly. (Pascal) 11. Successful man mark: 3 years old, does not wet his pants; 5 years old, able to feed himself; 18 years old, able to drive yourself; 20 years of age,paul smith cufflinks, ######ual life; 30 years old, the rich; 40 years old, the rich ; 50 years old, the rich; 60 years of age, ######ual life; 70 years old, able to drive yourself; 80 years old, able to feed himself; 90 years old, not wet his pants. Hey, life is a cycle of ... ah ... 12. Interviews city manager: What qualifications? Not completed primary school. A fight it? Routine. A criminal record it? Just come out. Physical it? Hawker tricycle kick can be kicked. Ganqiang someone else? This is my strength, take your own with the same. Old man daring to fight it? Side dishes, Andie is to be I crippled the. You passed the exam, our city managers need people like you! Ask how to do an accident? Say that they are temporary workers. 13.: \to become a villain. 15.: \. . After we use the formula to exterminate 00, 90, after examination exterminate, exterminate 80 after housing prices, unemployment exterminate 70, the city manager after 60 exterminate, exterminate laid off after 50, 40, after the demolition exterminate, destroy health care reform off after 30. Diansha left? 17. See the word, feel irony: In the past we tried to learn English is to understand the West, is now desperate to learn English is to understand China 18. Early in the morning sitting in the company of my colleagues focus to drive, so when the red light next to the stop a Cayenne is a beautiful, lower the window aiming for a preview, colleagues said confidently: \just the green light, we spread the duck ran away, I saw one foot oil Cayenne caught up, lower the window, shouted down on us: What classes have seen the morning so the mistress, speak,cheap silver jewelry! 19. A gentleman helps his wife to buy underwear, because did not help his wife bought, so I do not know which to buy a size! Pull a long time with the clerk, the clerk had to take the fruit to describe. Clerk: papaya? ! President: no! no! Clerk: Apple? ! President: No, no! Clerk: wax? ! President: Another smaller! Clerk: eggs? ! Very pleased, Mr. said: Yes! Yes! The clerk turned to get, who suddenly exclaimed: Miss Wait a minute! Oh is fried! 20. There are some things we always do not understand; some people, we always could not guess; some road, we always realize different; some reason, we always can not figure out; some threshold,ed hardy shirts, but we always cross; Some wounds we are never cured; some days, we always can not sleep; some, we always can not go; some love, we always can not tell; some love, we always get. ------ Ten confused life