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Allmemoryofhisformerlifeitseemsatfirsthadfallenutt erlyaway;
nothingsurvivedtoremindhimofit;andthushelostallsta ndardof
comparison.Thestatehemovedinwastoocompletetoadmito fstand-
ardsorofcriticaljudgment.Fortheseconfineimprisonan dbelittle
whereashewasfree.Hisescapewasunconditioned.Fromthe thirty
yearsofhispreviouslivingnosinglefragmentbrokethrou gh.Theab-
sorption was absolute.
Ireallydobelieveandknowmyselfhesaidtomeacrossthat
spottedtable-cloth,uggs for less,thatforthetimeIwasmergedintothebeingofan-
otherabeingimmenselygreaterthanmyself.PerhapsoldSt ahlwas
rightperhapsoldcrazyFechner;anditactuallywasthecon sciousness
oftheEarth.Icanonlytellyouthatthewholeexperiencele ftnoroomin
meforothermemories;allIhadpreviouslyknownwasgonewi ped
cleanaway.Yetmuchofwhatcameinitsplaceisbeyondmetod escribe;
andforacuriousreason.It'snotthesizeorsplendorthatp reventthe
tellingbutratherthesublimesimplicityofitall.Iknown olanguage
todaysimpleenoughtoutterit.Farbehindwordsitliesasd ifficultof
fullrecoveryasthedreamsofdeepsleepastheecstasyofth ereligious
elusiveasthemysteryofKublaKhanorthePatmosvisionsof St.John.
Full recaptureI am convincedis not possible at all in words.
Andatthetimeitdidnotseemlikevision;itwassonatural; unstud-
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